3,2,1 Happy New Year.

Billions of people all over the world counted down the end of 2019 last night at midnight.

I was one of them, maybe you were too.

It was just me and may wife and kids and a couple friends, but it was a wonderful time.

We had special snacks and played board games, and laughed.  It was great to hear my kids laugh.

Then, around 11:30, we turned on the TV and watched the count down in Time Square.

It’s always amazing to watch everything that goes on there, but I think I still prefer my living room.

It might be nice to have a bit bigger gathering, but being crammed in with a million people seems a bit more intense then I am ready for.

At 11:59, the Mayor of New York and his family pushed the button to start the ball dropping, and for all of us to count down the last minute of 2019.  And as New York City started to cheer and my own house readied the silly sting and party poppers, my mind raced through a quick review of 2019

58, 57.  It was a heck of a year, I tell people we got our money’s worth, but I’m glad to move on.

It was a year were my dad went from living pretty independent, to needing more help, to ending up in the hospital, then a nursing home.   We were somewhat relived that he could be with mom, but we knew this was the beginning of the end.

51, 50, 49

I thought of the garden I planted back in the spring.   I don’t really need to for the food, but for as long as I can remember, my family had planted a garden.  So even if it’s not productive or necessary, the connection to my past makes it something I enjoy.

42,41,40

Then in June, Dad took a fall, and probably had a heart attack and by the end of the month, he was gone.  It was a sad time,  but the way my family came together to say good-bye to dad and support each other was a blessing.   We got to truly celebrate his life with extended family and friends.   Moms mind was clouded with dementia, so she didn’t know what had happened, we decided to wait to let her know.

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The rest of the summer had it’s excitement.    We had a nice camping trip and some time on the beach,  but I also managed to get stung by a bee.   Didn’t end up being life threating like when I was a kid,  but I did have to have my wedding ring cut off.   As sad as that was, it was harder to watch my kids struggle with becoming young adults.   I found myself questioning everything I have done as a parent.

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There were some bright spots, Heidi’s new job continued to go well, and she got to take a nice trip to Texas for work.   My job is going good and the trips I took went well.   The weeds took over the garden, but we still got to spend some nice time out side in our yard.   I got to spend some great Sundays at the nursing home with mom, and met lots of great people there,  I think I’d like to volunteer there some day.

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Then, in the fall, mom had a few days when her mind was clear and we could talk and catch up on things.   She knew dad was gone,  she was ok with us selling the house,  seemed to her there was no need to hang around here anymore,  so she went to be with dad again.   I’ve never been so sad and so happy at the same time.

There was more time with family and friends and remembering happy times, but I think we had all had enough of saying good bye.

12, 11

The rest of the year was a whirl wind of work and trying to keep things moving in the right direction.

But I’m still incredibly blessed to have such a great wife, and such a wonderful family, even with everything that happened this year, we are so fortunate, there is nothing to complain about.

10, 9, 8

As I looked to 2020, I prayed things would be ok for me, better for my kids.   That my extended family could get together just for fun, there will be plenty more good-byes, let’s not wait for them to celebrate.

6, 5, 4

I hope I can find time to lose weight and gain back health, spend less time watching YouTube and more time writing my own stories that I hope people will enjoy reading.  Be more thankful and more generous, happier and more helpful.  And do all I can to make 2020 a whole lot better than 2019.

3, 2, 1

Happy New Year.